I was two things last week: tired and busy. The two states are not a good combo and it made me even more sensitive as to how I communicate with others and get stuff done.
In this haze of being tired and busy I acutely noticed how people don’t pay attention to matching energy. Matching energy just means speaking at the same pace and either lowering your voice or making it louder so you’re in sync with the other person you’re trying to build rapport with.
I’m a naturally excitable and charismatic type of person so I always need to watch this as my communication style sits firmly at one end of the spectrum. Not everyone speaks as quickly or as enthusiastically (thank God), so I’m forever trying to slow things down so I can get on the same wave length as others. And when I was exhausted and trying to get through a pretty hectic to do list last week, those who didn’t respect my need to ‘get on with it’ left me really frustrated.
Ever struggled with building rapport? Next time it happens, be really aware of matching energy. Is the person speaking slowly? Then slow down your speech to match their pace. Do they seem in a rush, agitated, distracted? Then use less words, get on with it and let them do the same. Are they speaking really quietly? Turn your volume down too.
The above is a very basic lesson in what neuro-linguistic programming is all about. Used well, you’ll see your communication improve and your relationships flourish.