I’m now four days overdue with my third baby (my bubs tend to stay put for ages – my first daughter was ten days ‘late’ and the second was fifteen) and this means that I’m missing out on a few things that are important to me.

My best friend turned 40 last weekend in Melbourne and because I couldn’t fly I missed her party. And for the past season, I’ve missed out on playing netball with my beloved Business Chicks team in our corporate comp. I also sit here with my big belly lamenting the fact that my team are now in Adelaide, about to pull off our biggest ever event (with over 1,700 people) tomorrow morning with Sir Richard Branson. Then they’ll fly straight to Brisbane to do it all over again the next day. This happened last time Branson spoke for Business Chicks – I was overdue with my second bub, so I missed out on that too. (The pic below is when he spoke for us in Sydney and hooray – I wasn’t pregnant and about to give birth!)

All these experiences are designed to teach me patience, and teach me how I can still lead and inspire without being ‘right there’. So I made sure my bestie was spoilt with flowers, a little gift, and surprise champagne at the place she dined at her for birthday. I got me and my bump down to the side of the netball court on a few occasions and yelled my heart out in encouragement for the netballing Business Chicks.

And today, I know I’ve done all that I can to support my team to pull off the biggest events of their life without me. I know they’re going to be fine. In fact, they’ll blitz it! And while they’re at it, I’ll practice the art of letting go, trusting others and cheering on from the sideline.

Geldof is also a successful businessman and touched briefly on a few of his ventures. I was interested to learn that, just like Richard Branson, Geldof doesn’t have an office. He said he works from his kitchen bench each day.

I’ve toyed with the idea of working from home a little bit (I’m currently in our city office every day) but have never fully gotten my head around it. We did an office refurb in my last business which resulted in me and my business partner having our own individual offices, separated from the team. She loved it. I hated it.

Half the fun of going to work for me is being involved in the office’s activities. Feeding off the energy, having a joke with my colleagues, being able to ask a question then and there without having to set a meeting – these are all reasons I choose to go to an office each day. And open plan works for my leadership style.

However, after hearing Geldof and Branson speak at Business Chicks, I’m questioning the logic of going into the office every single day. Think of the time they save commuting each day, think of the uninterrupted blocks of time where they’re free to focus on the important stuff, think of the perspective they must achieve looking at their businesses from afar.

Curious to hear from you as to what works best for you, particularly if you’re a leader of a team (and not working by yourself at home).

I also spent some time with him on Sydney harbour and had the job of chaperoning him around throughout the week. Here’s a behind the scenes look at what I learned from him.

You’ve got to work very hard to achieve the level of success he has. At every available opportunity, Tony was on his computer or iPhone. In fact, there were only a few moments when he wasn’t connected to either. We’d get to a venue, have five minutes to get onstage, and he’d still boot up his computer, find a network and get some work done.

Happiness comes in all forms and levels. You’d expect a guy who wrote an international bestseller about happiness to be jumping out of his skin with joy. He wasn’t. He’s spent lots of time researching the science of happiness and debunks the myth that it’s all about those adrenalin-fuelled moments when you want to pump your fist in the air and hug strangers next to you. In his mind, happiness comes in three forms: those ‘rock star’ moments I just described; when you’re in flow and everything comes easily; and thirdly, when you’re working for a higher purpose other than yourself.

You don’t need charisma in spades to be a successful CEO. Tony admits he is incredibly introverted. When asked if all the fun stuff he does in his business (dressing up, endless parties/celebrations, parades around the office etc) is a reflection of his personality and personal ethos, he said nup. He likes to think of himself as the designer of a greenhouse where all the plants are the same size and they all move and grow together, rather than him being the biggest and tallest plant.

He approaches business like a science experiment. I’ve never met a more researched, well-read, educated (about business) individual than Tony Hsieh. He’s concerned himself with details such as the optimal space between employee’s desks to increase collaboration and innovation, and has even gone so far as to move the entrance to the Zappos office so that all employees have to walk through all departments, thus increasing the amount of ’serendipitous collisions’ which ultimately lead to greater communication and teamwork.

If you’re looking to grow your business to reach revenues north of $1 billion, or if you fancy exiting one day to Amazon for over $1.2 billion, then maybe you’ll do well to adopt some of the above practises.

Read some of my team members’ take aways from the workshops here.

I also love learning about the cool initiatives that our members have started as a result of wanting to do more and be more. Recently I blogged about Sophie Bartho who founded One Dollar Day – she raised $55,000 and will use these funds to build a health clinic in Laos.

Another one of our members Emma Hogan also launched a fab project this year called The Amazing People Project. Emma has already raised $115,000 for five charities through encouraging people to do amazing things and raising $1,000 at the same time.

Something that’s keeping me up at night at the moment (in a good way – my head’s spinning!) is our partnership with The Hunger Project Australia. Next year we’ll be taking two groups of Business Chicks to Uganda and Bangladesh, to see firsthand The Hunger Project’s work. These trips are not for everyone. It’s only for those who want to play a bigger game and get out of their comfort zone. If you’re looking for a way to challenge yourself next year, then check this out and consider joining us.

Our guests this morning were Jane Caro (author, Gruen Transfer panelist, media personality) and Catherine Fox (deputy editor AFRBoss, author and columnist for the Financial Review.)

Our speakers co-authored a book called The F Word: How we Learned to Swear by Feminism, and this morning they took the stage at Business Chicks to share the story of their friendship and their experiences in the workplace; as wives; as daughters; and as mothers.

I’ve got to admit I’ve always been a bit scared of the word feminism. But I’m not now.

I’ve always associated the word feminism with people like Germaine Greer, and had images of women burning their bras every time it comes up (as I mentioned in the Good Weekend a little while ago.)

This morning Jane and Catherine were able to paint a much more accurate and aspirational view of what it means to be a feminist. Being a feminist doesn’t mean you must put down men, or think you’re superior to them. Being a feminist doesn’t mean you have to cut off your hair and only wear pants. Being a feminist doesn’t mean you must lose your femininity in anyway.

What it does mean is putting yourself out there, and having a voice when it comes to equality for women, whether that’s equality in the home or in the workplace. It’s about speaking out about fairness in unpaid work and expecting your partner to contribute equally around the home, and if you have kids, with the parenting too. It’s about continuing the conversation in relation to paid work and the gender pay gaps that are still (surprisingly) so prevalent in Australia.

Jane talked about one of her pet hates being when women start sentences with “I’m not a feminist, but….” She encouraged the audience to change our languaging to be proud of wanting to be equal. From here on in, she said, a good way to start a sentence is “I am a feminist, and…”

And from now on, I won’t be one little bit scared of trying it!

Whether you’re a Gillard fan or not, today let’s put that aside. Today let’s just rejoice that we’ve reached a milestone. Our country is, for the first time in our history, lead by a woman. She will be sworn in by our first ever female Governor-General. No matter who you vote for, please just take some time today and be grateful for where we are today.

Today young women will look to Gillard and say “that could be me one day.” We now have a role model who has achieved something that no one else has, and it sets a precedence that anything is possible for women in this country.

I, like you, will be watching her journey closely. Congrats Julia.

I think it’s fair to say that this is one area that can be more difficult for women. I’ve seen it over and over again throughout my career. A guy will have no problem in saying ‘Can you grab me a coffee please?’ whereas I might put it like this: ‘Um, excuse me, if you’re going downstairs to grab a coffee would you mind picking one up for me too? Oh good, you don’t mind? You sure? Oh, thanks so much, that’d be great’. I try and be mindful of complicating the request, but in the effort to ‘get liked’ and not put anyone out, it often comes across that way.

Why can’t we just ask for what we want?

Well in my case it’s because I fear not being liked and I fear that people will see me in some other way than ‘nice’. Dr Lois Frankel puts it perfectly in her book (one of my all time faves) by the same name -Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office. Not that I’m shooting for the corner office, but you know what I mean.

There’s so much to be learnt from Frankel’s work. It impacted me in the same way Ina May Gaskin’s Guide to Childbirth did when I was preparing to give birth and in the same way Michael Gerber’s The E-Myth jolted me into reality when I started my first company. If you’re either thinking of giving birth or going into business, run out and get both. Now.

I can’t say the journey from being nice to directly asking for what I want is going swimmingly so far. I tried it out with someone today and she pretty much said no to my request (not in so many words, but that was the message back). So, I thought ‘don’t back down’ and stated that I meant what I’d requested and to please go ahead. She did, and all worked out well in the end. Truth is, old Em would’ve said “oh, ok, no problem” but the new one, equipped with the knowledge that it’s ok to ask for what you want stormed ahead and got the outcome.

Can’t say it felt good first time around

I had a bit of guilt going on and the little voice inside my head said “she’s not going to like you any more and your relationship will never be the same again”. I’m hoping that over time, that voice will subside and I’ll find a stronger more direct one to replace it. I’ll keep you posted.

There’s no doubt that blowing raspberries would be easier than this journey, but I’m going to keep working on it.

What do you think?

See any of yourself in here? What lessons or experiences do you have to share with us?

He’s every bit the charismatic leader. You can see that he has his team eating out of the palm of his hand. Kissing the camera, slapping the bum of one of his crew as he dismounts his bike, running up to his fans and jumping on them. He plays up and performs as if he’s on show. All the time.

Let’s get real about this

Charisma is about sex appeal, humour and charm. Rossi’s not the hottest and he’s not the most intelligent. Doesn’t need to be. Nor is Branson. What these two blokes share is an ability to laugh at themselves (think of Branson in a wedding dress for the launch of Virgin Brides and Rossi in a helmet with a donkey on it to honour his previous race where he made a silly mistake and fell off his bike).

They share an ability to capture the hearts and minds of the media and their fans by not playing by the rules. They act like themselves. They love what they do. They live life to the full. They are masters in business and sport respectively, but don’t take themselves too seriously.

And what do these two guys get from their charismatic style? Well for starters they have a loyal following of fans and are able to attract a lot of media interest. But more importantly, they draw together a team of people who worship them and would walk over hot coals to see them succeed. I’m sure if you aspired to move and shake in the world of motorcycle racing, you’d covet a role on Rossi’s team. And who hasn’t thought that they’d love to work with Branson at some point or another?

Think about the relationship you have with your team, the media, your customers – are you being real with them, being exciting and different in your approach, doing things that create buzz and interest? Try being charismatic Rossi/Branson-style, maybe first without the wheelie and the bottom slap.

Who’s your fave charismatic leader?

Are you lucky enough to work with them or are you just admiring them from afar?